July 21, 2005

WOUAELD YOU LIKE TO BUY SPERM DRUGS CHEAPEST??

I must apologise if every time you've come here recently you're assaulted with advertisements for FUN CASINO POKER NIGHTS FUN FOR ALL WORLD'S BIGGEST POKER GAME FREE MONEY or better still IS YOUR GIRLFRIEND UNHAPPY WITH YOUR LOW SP€RM C0UNT? WE HAVE THE CHEAPEST DR-|_|G$ ON THE INTERNET!!! WWW.VIAGRACHEAPEST606688121.COM

I'm being spammed to death. I suppose it serves me right. What goes around comes around. I really must stop writing those viruses and emailing them to every address my spyware can scramble from blogger.com and okcupid.

I feel like a six year old on Christmas eve. A happy child now, not one of those dying ones in the third world. I am sure they don't feel much different on Christmas eve than any other night. DO THEY KNOW IT'S CHRISTMAS TIME AT ALL? One of the deeper questions.

Well it's because the husbandry unit returns from foreign land tomorrow. He has had a furry Russian hat surgically implanted into his head in place of the usual toupée. Which is a relief. At least that's what the postcard says, so here's hoping.

How am I? Well ok, thank you for asking. Up to my eyeballs at work, but thankfully I shut the door on the office every evening and am free to go home to drink myself into a delirious stupor, at which point I ring my friends and cry for a while. Then I accuse them of having affairs with K, or of putting toilet rolls into their bag from my bathroom the last time they were round. My mother resents these accusations more than most. But then an adulterating thief would be indignant, wouldn't they.

This week I ate my first giant mushroom vol au vent. I may have spelt that incorrectly. It was the size of my head. It was prepared by L. Kudos to L and his giant mushroom food product making skills. Also his wine purchasing skills proved excellent, and I demonstrated my gratitude by drinking it, and providing him with a copy of the children's mini-book Mr. Clever. I thought I was paying L a compliment. Turns out Mr. Clever is a thick shit. Sorry, L. I didn't know children's books were ironic. That's postmodernism for you. Thanks a bunch Andy Warhol.

That's it for now. I am going to cook my husband's favourite meal and we'll have it tomorrow night when he flies in. BOY WILL HIS ARMS BE TIRED. Where's a drummer when you need a good ba dum tsch? It will be a microwaved delight. No, it won't. I am making a chilli, which tastes so much better when it's been left overnight to absorb the flavours. By the way, I watched the Druid Chef programme thing on TG4 tonight and that chef needs some vocab lessons. Nice man, but please don't say lovely more than once in any sentence, and don't say a sentence with lovely in it more than once every five sentences.

"Now, I am going to put our lovely stew into our lovely blue bowl with all the lovely noodles and the lovely juices and aromas and lovely herbs and here we are by the lovely stream and the sun is shining and this is lovely, this is what the monks did five hundred years ago, the communcal cooking, it was lovely then and this is lovely now."

neuro-praxis -- Having A Lovely Time In Her Lovely House

Posted by neuro-praxis on July 21, 2005 11:18 PM, in the category Bushy Hair