April 23, 2006

The End Is Nigh

Well, I'm not yet sure if I've sobered up from the hen weekend, but thankfully Zoomspouse has done enough sobering up for the both of us by filling out the census with a most unsettling zeal. We are now officially a pair of beered up statistics, and he couldn't be happier about it. You should see him on the days he gets to use his vote! Creepy.

WELL NOW I EAT MY HAT

Or perhaps my words, whichever proves tastier. Although I just ate some pork and rice which I am not sure anything could top, taste-wise. Fact is, the hen weekend was a weekend to top all girly weekends. Decent hotel, tasty food, copious beers, rides in police cars (really!), great company, private cinemas, champagne receptions, lots of laughing and crying (fist fights). The single piss-poor event was the evening-long contribution of a very intimidating and drunken thirty-something Liverpudlian man also staying at our hotel who hung round our group in the residents' bar insulting the chief bridesmaid and making idiotic comments on our singing like, "You think war is funny? HA HA HA HA HA HA." Please note, he did not laugh: he said HA HA. There were 26 of us. What was he doing?

The following morning I found myself in the lift with him and wait for it: his young WIFE. I was overcome with pity and disgust. I said to him, ""Do you know what a fucktard you were last night? You should be ashamed to call yourself a man." And to his wife: "Get away from him now before you catch his STDs."

Next time, it will be aloud.

Sometimes I wish Presbyterians had confession. I guess this blog is my confession, in a way. Can anyone give me absolution for my self-righteousness and scorn? In return I can sing you a lullaby. It's all about give and take with me, isn't it?

Anyway, I have two full days of loving to catch up on. The poor lamb has been deprived.

neuro-praxis -- Totally Out Of Your Goddamn Mind

Posted by neuro-praxis on April 23, 2006 10:24 PM, in the category Bushy Hair